Number One Fan review – four hours of guaranteed, preposterous fun

Sally Lindsay and Jill Halfpenny are incapable of hitting a false note in this tale of a daytime TV presenter being stalked. It’s full of twists and turns – even if it isn’t wildly sophisticated

The new Channel 5 (I know! Me too – but yes, it’s still around) thriller Number One Fan stars two Coronation Street graduates from back in the days when the soap was still good. My peak Corrie-watching years were early 90s to early 00s. Which means I was there when it looked like the crowns were about to pass from queens such as Rita, Vera and Bet Lynch to their honourable successors, like Shelley Unwin, Karen McDonald, Fiz – and maybe to a younger Battersby or two, if the family learned to stop yelling and give us a bit more northern wit. Alas, their reign was brief and now there is no question that Coronation Street is worse than it has ever been. We do not have time to get into this now. Suffice to say: the presence of Sally Lindsay (Shelley, as was) and Jill Halfpenny (Rebecca Hopkins, of the same era, as love interest for Martin Platt) is enough to assure you of a good time.

Here, Halfpenny plays Lucy Logan, a beloved daytime TV presenter with her own, mildly emetic show, a sponsorship deal for her onscreen wardrobe, and a new line of pampering products coming out under her name, in partnership with a brand-friendly charity. Apart from the monthly box of expensive truffles that are actually made of manure (I want to know who bit into the first one and discovered this; a bad work experience week for someone, I reckon) sent by an unknown non-admirer, life is good.